Chapter 183: What Is Wrong With Me

Olivia’s POV

His touch was almost unbearable—teasing, slow, driving me mad. My whole body ached with confusion. Shame. Desire. Regret.

But then—

A flash.

Levi’s face. Lifeless. Pale. The way he’d looked just hours ago, lying there unconscious. “You’re still their wife.” A voice which wasn’t that of my wolf echoed in my head.

My breath caught sharply in my throat.

No.

I couldn’t do this.

In that split second, while Damien’s guard was down, drunk on the moment—my body jolted with speed. I twisted, yanked myself upright with everything I had left, and stood.

His eyes widened in surprise, hand still reaching for where I had just been.

I grabbed my gown, yanked it down, my fingers trembling as I fixed my underwear. My breath was ragged, my heart pounding like a drum.

“No,” I said, barely able to get the word out.

“Olivia—” he started, his voice low, strained.

But I shook my head, taking a shaky step backward. “Don’t. Just… don’t.”

I didn’t wait for his response. I turned and rushed out of my room, my feet flying over the tiled floors. A few staff furrowed their brows as they glanced at me, but I didn’t care. I ran like I was trying to escape a storm.

Because maybe I was.

I didn’t stop until I reached the garden. Only then did I collapse onto the grass, burying my face in my hands. My whole body still burned from where he had touched me.

“Damn it! What is wrong with me!” I groaned, angry at myself.

I pulled my hand from my face and stared up at the night sky. The stars blurred as unshed tears clung stubbornly to my lashes.

“What is wrong with me…” I whispered again—this time softer. Less angry. More confused.

My hands curled into the grass.

I closed my eyes, trying to calm the storm inside me.

“I’m just confused…” I said aloud, needing to hear the words. Maybe if I said it enough times, it would feel true.

“I’m confused,” I repeated. “That’s all. That’s why my body reacted. It didn’t mean anything.”

But even as I said it, I didn’t believe it.

Because it had meant something. Not love, no—at least, I hoped not. But it wasn’t nothing either. It was the ache of loneliness. The pain of betrayal. The hunger of someone who hadn’t been touched gently.

That was the worst part. It wasn’t Damien I had wanted—it was the comfort. The illusion of being loved. Of being seen.

I pressed my fists to my eyes and let out a long, trembling breath.

I thought of them.

“I’m still their wife,” I reminded myself, my voice barely a whisper now. “Still their mate.” I wished that truth didn’t hurt.

And until the Council settles all of this mess, I won’t let anybody touch me. Not because I care for them, but because of my own sanity. My own conscience.

I stayed in the garden a little longer, gathering what little strength I had.

Eventually, I rose and returned to my room. Alpha Damien was gone, but his scent still lingered in the air.

I locked the door and crawled straight into bed.

Lying beneath the blankets, I stared up at the ceiling.

The truth was, I didn’t know who I was anymore. Not since all of this began.

The triplets.

My mates.

Men I had grown to love… so deeply it scared me.

Lennox —fierce, impulsive, reckless. He made my blood boil and my heart race all in one breath.

Levi —gentle but sharp. Observant. Calculated. The one who always saw right through me. Who made me feel safe even when I didn’t want to be.

And Louis … gods. Sweet, tortured Louis. The quiet one.

They were mine. My mates. And they broke me. They loved me. Hurt me. Gave me everything. Took everything away.

And I still cared for them.

No matter how much I wished I didn’t.

Then there was Gabriel.

The man I barely knew—but who made my heart flutter every time he looked at me. Like I mattered.

He stared at me with the eyes of a man in love. When he smiled, my stomach twisted. When he spoke, I listened too closely. And when he offered to meet me at the border… I’d said yes far too quickly. Just to see him.

I didn’t know what we were. Not yet. But something was starting. A tiny spark of desire… maybe even love.

And then…

Damien.

Alpha Damien.

The triplets’ uncle.

A man I should have never allowed that close.

Cold. Dangerous. Infuriating.

But gods —mysterious.

He didn’t say much. He didn’t have to. His presence was enough to stir something in me I didn’t want to name. Something dark. Forbidden. Exciting.

The way he touched me… the way he looked at me. Not like the others. Not even like a woman he desired. Like a challenge. Like I was something wild he wanted to tame.

And I hated how much that thrilled me.

Maybe it was wrong. Maybe it was all just loneliness and confusion and a desperate need to feel like someone’s—anyone’s—choice.

But that didn’t make it any less real.

I sighed and closed my eyes.

Five men.

Five different kinds of danger.

I forced myself to sleep, leaving everything in the hands of the moon goddess. Morning came. I hadn’t slept much. I spent the whole night tossing and turning.

Now, Nora and Lolita were in my room, helping me get ready for a pack meeting with the she-wolves. They moved around quietly, laying out clothes, brushing my hair, and setting out shoes—never asking too many questions. Maybe they understood I wasn’t in the mood to chit-chat.

I sat in front of the mirror, my eyes tired, my heart still heavy from the night before.

Then—a sharp knock at the door made all three of us turn.

Lolita moved to open it, and there he was.

Lennox.

Standing tall, dressed in black, his expression unreadable. He held a box in his hands. His eyes landed on me and softened—just a little.

“There’s a function tonight,” he said, walking in like he still owned the place. “Alpha Damien’s birthday. I assume you are attending.”

He set the box down on the table beside me. “I and my brothers got this dress for you. Please, will you accept it.”

I looked at the box… then up at him.

I frowned.

“Oh, so now you remember to bring me a dress?” I said, standing. “Where was this energy when I needed one before? Rather, you showered it on Anita!”

He opened his mouth, but before he could speak—

The door opened again.

Alpha Damien stepped in.

He didn’t look at Lennox. Not even once.

His eyes went straight to me.

“I brought you a dress,” he said simply, his voice deep and authoritative. “I hope you’ll wear it tonight. For me.”

My heart dropped. Two dresses. Two men. Both claiming me in their own ways. And I just stood there, caught between old vows and new sins.

Lennox’s jaw clenched. “She’s still my wife,” he snapped, stepping forward. “And my brothers. You should be ashamed, Uncle Damien. What is this?” He looked at the box Damien held. “You’re really planning to steal her from us?”

Damien’s face didn’t change.

Lennox kept going.

“Is that your plan?” he growled. “To snatch her away—just like Sofia was taken from you?”